If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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