Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
