What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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