I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
