I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Drunk is a universal language darling
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize