i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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