Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
