I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
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He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
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Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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