Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
