i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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