It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
This toilet bowl is my home.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
