You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
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