I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
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