At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
