Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
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