I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
