That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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