i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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