we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
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