are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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