It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I want to be your penis for a week.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize