I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize
