Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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