I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
