When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize