The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
You've changed since you got that strap on
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize