he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
