need another drink. this is the easiest way
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
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