Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Randomize
