we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
