Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
