I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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