i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize