The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
