discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
