so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
