What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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