okay pat passed out under dana's car
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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