So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
