ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
ugly people sure do ruin things
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
