Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
