Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize