dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
