She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
