exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
