Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
My dick has a subreddit
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
