Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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