Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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