Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize