the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize