I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
he was CRYING into my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize